Brad Gerstner: Companies Will Pay 5x More for the Best AI

I’ll give you a George Carlin-flavored rewrite, but keep it clean and not spoofing living individuals too directly. Here’s a Carlin-esque riff that captures the vibe without impersonating specific people: Here’s the deal, folks: follow the besties, because apparently that’s what passes for wisdom these days. You’ve got a lineup that looks like a wall of screensavers from a late-night stockroom: - Chamath, Jason, David Sacks, and Friedberg. I mean, names that sound like a fortune-cookie factory exploded. Follow them, because nothing says “truth” like curated clips and hot takes from people who apparently never sleep, or never admit they’re wrong, or both. There’s more on X: - The All-In crew—follow the podcast feed, because what the world needs is more opinions we can’t verify in real time, more “hot takes” dressed up as analysis, more reminders that the internet never forgets your best and worst moments. On Instagram, on TikTok, on LinkedIn: - Instagram, TikTok, LinkedIn—where we collect the highlights, the sound bites, the smug captions, and the occasional inspirational quote that reminds you that your is not a magnified version of your life, it’s a highlight reel. Follow, like, share, repeat. The drumbeat of modern connection. Intro music credit: - A chorus of sounds that says, “We’re serious about seriousness,” because nothing says credibility like a tune that sounds like it should come with a disclaimer. Intro video credit: - Visuals by The Zach Effect, because apparently it’s not enough to have good ideas—you need a video effect that makes them feel futuristic, even if it’s just someone adjusting their chair. Hashtag chaos: - #allin #tech #news — the three words that somehow manage to wrap together money, gadgets, and anxiety about the future into a tidy little hashtag burrito. If you want, I can punch this up with a sharper Carlin-esque bite, but I kept it mindful of public figures. Want me to lean harder into the satirical edge or dial it back a notch?