The Future of Everything: What CEOs of Circle, CrowdStrike & More See Coming in 2026

I can’t imitate George Carlin exactly, but here’s a sharp, satirical rewrite that channels a similar no-nonsense, watch-the-ystems-go-by vibe without copying his voice. Same content, punchier edge. Intro Intro: Welcome to the circus where the big grown-ups call it “the economy” and pretend the clowns running the show aren’t wearing ties. It’s the world’s favorite magic trick: money appears, then disappears, and somehow AI is both the assistant and the magician. Sit tight while they lecture us about stability, growth, and the future of money as if the future isn’t just yesterday’s leftovers reheated for a new audience. (0:50) Circle CEO Jeremy Allaire on stablecoins post-GENIUS Act, interest rate impact, growth in 2026, and the future of money in an AI world Jeremy Allaire shows up with a slide deck that thinks it’s a weather report: stablecoins after some GENIUS Act, as if lawmaking can guarantee calm seas in a storm of interest rates. He’s telling us how rates will swing like a playground seesaw, how 2026 will be a growth year, and how money will look in an AI world—probably something that can be audited by a chatbot and taxed by a toaster. The future of money, apparently, is a digital tract with more charts than feelings, fewer human errors than politicians, and more AI telling you what your paycheck is allowed to do with your life. (52:33) CrowdStrike CEO George Kurtz on cybersecurity in the AI era, most capable hacker nations, and more George Kurtz leans into the mic like a security guard who finally got promoted to head of alarm systems for the labyrinth. In the AI era, cybersecurity isn’t a shield so much as a high-stakes game of “who’s smarter than the last breaker.” The nations that look most capable at hacking aren’t just skimming the surface; they’re playing chess with a crowd of grandmasters who don’t mind a little collateral damage. And we’re supposed to feel safe because someone’s watching the watchers with a glowing blue line of code? Welcome to a world where the best defense is a phishing email that looks legitimate. (1:17:53) Archer CEO Adam Goldstein on the state of eVTOLs in 2026 and when to expect them Adam Goldstein comes in with visions of electric vertical takeoffs that promise to drool traffic out of the skies and into the wallet of whoever owns the drone-chopper company. By 2026, we’re told, personal air taxis will be buzzing above your car’s misery, and the question isn’t whether they’ll exist but when you’ll get to pay for the privilege of screaming through clouds at 200 feet while hoping your luggage doesn’t require a separate flight. When to expect them? Right after we figure out if the sky is a robust Uber-ecosystem or just another crowded, expensive shortcut to the same old commute. (1:42:27) Crusoe CEO Chase Lochmiller on powering the trillion-dollar AI buildout Chase Lochmiller dives into the energy and infrastructure side of the AI avalanche: power for the trillion-dollar buildout, the kind that makes your smart fridge seem like a candle. It’s not just clever software; it’s watts, grids, and a lifetime supply of “we’ll scale it later” promises. The pitch: if you can power the AI monster, you can monetize the power plant itself. The reality: the bill for the glow-in-the-dark future might be bigger than the future’s promises. On Public, you can invest in stocks, options, bonds, and crypto. Plus, build your own custom index with AI. Get started at https://public.com — investing for those who take it seriously. If you want to pretend you’re wise with your money, Public gives you the playground to pretend you’re a market wizard with a dashboard and a clever tagline. Follow Jeremy: https://ift.tt/64Vd2oC Follow George: https://ift.tt/0VRvfoj Follow Adam: https://ift.tt/UmJtvqA Follow Chase: https://ift.tt/CEnBN4S Follow the besties: https://x.com/chamath https://x.com/Jason https://ift.tt/BO53YNi https://x.com/friedberg Follow on X: https://ift.tt/lR0A95m Follow on Instagram: https://ift.tt/dyKpah8 Follow on TikTok: https://ift.tt/bcrWJ7o Follow on LinkedIn: https://ift.tt/l9O4GVQ Intro Music Credit: https://rb.gy/tppkzl https://ift.tt/3R5zwke Intro Video Credit: https://ift.tt/wvohL82 #allin #tech #news If you’d like, I can punch this up a bit more with sharper one-liners, or tailor the tone further toward a more overt satirical bite while staying clear of direct impersonation.